Big Sur
by zennahrose
Summary: Inu/Kag hippie love :
1. Chapter 1

They wanted more for their children, always more, and a better life. Away from all the burdens and dilemmas of the material world. They meant well, as adults often do, but that didn't stop the children from realizing the flaws of such an idealistic world.

He had been plagued with this dreams for the past few months, not that they were horrifying or anything like the night terrors he remembered his grandfather having when he was a little boy, the ones about the war, but they were just so…random. He would be sleeping so peacefully, and then the noises would start, bees or something. This constant humming. Then he'd be aware of his being within the dream, he could feel everything. Wind and all. Time would stop, and She would be there, staring at him with those dark eyes, which was odd because in reality they were the clearest blue he'd ever seen. She touched her palm to his cheek, warm and sticky with some liquid. This time he woke up. Mom was standing over his bed with incents chanting something. "You were having a bad dream, I think," she explained as if that made things okay. He ignored her and got dressed, prepared to leave. Prepared to do nothing all day. Just like any other day. Maybe he'd chill at Miroku's today. It was always so boring around this place. "Hey man." He said dully, giving his good friend a fist bump when he barged in through his eternally open kitchen door. He was rolling blunts while his dad was drinking his morning coffee. He was unapproachable until a few minutes after the second brew. Miroku looked at him with slight scrutiny. "I figured you'd be at the shrine all day… not that I'm complaining." He said coolly. Inuyasha furrowed his brows together. "Why would I be at the shrine?" he mumbled numbly. He had already eased himself into a cast iron chair, and light up. Miroku was now amused. He had the slightest twinge of a smirk on his face. "Kagomes back. Nobody told you?" he asked, appreciating the fact that for once he had the upper hand over his cynical friend. Inuyasha coughed. Nobody told him. "No way." That's all he could think to say. Miroku nodded. "Yeah. Sango said she flunked out of that fancy boarding school or something. Anyway she's back, taking care of her mom." He said matter-of-factly. Immediately Inuyasha shot out of his seat, and bounded for the exit.

He paced all over the land looking for signs of her presence. The air seemed fresher somehow. The children more playful. She wasn't at the shrine. That had been the first place he looked, but it was just her mom doing her aroma therapy. "You just missed her. She went off somewhere with Naraku." She informed him with a weak smile. He could tell that she was dying. He shook that from his mind. Naraku, that bothered him for some reason. Why was she hooking up with him now? He had to put on that false bravado walking in there. Not that he disliked Naraku at all; he was a pretty chill guy, who always had killer weed. It was just, her. Naraku looked up from his mini stash splayed out on the table. "Yash, What the fuck is up man?" he cheered ecstatically to see an old friend. He was gone. Inuyasha smirked lightly. "Nothing, trying to chill that's all." He lied looking around the sun bathed living room area. There she was, sitting on the bay window sill, with her knees pulled to her chest. She was thinking deeply about something. He could just tell. "Hey." Her voice had a smile in it when she looked over at him. Smoke seeped from her nostrils. "Hey." He said back taking a seat beside her. She had been crying. "I meant to stop by later. I missed you." Her raspy voice assured him apologetically. "It's cool. Me too." He promised, taking a hit of that potent shit Naraku was famous for. She smirked at his unwavering chillness. "I know you get worried about me, being on my own. I didn't reply to letters to quickly either." Her voice trailed off, she knew he had been a wreck about the degeneration of their correspondence since she had been too. He nodded. "You're back. That's all that matters." He whispered liking the way her hand felt on his toned forearm.


	2. Chapter 2

There were days when he didn't want to even get out of bed. He would lay in bed all day moping, listening to Bob Dylan and Neil Young. His parents never commenting on the fact that he was slightly more temperamental then his older brother. Moodier too. Then again, Sesshomaru was always hopped up on some sort of opiate. But his little mood disorder couldn't compare to whatever it was that Kagome had to be going through with her mom being sick, and all. She was pretending like everything was the way it was before she left. Hanging out with everyone, like it didn't bother her that her mom was dying. She was focused on the drugs right in front of her, nothing else. "Do these lines with me baby." Naraku encouraged her, handing off the rolled up dollar bill. Kagome accepted the challenge willingly. Inuyasha stared at her with stunted shock. He didn't know she'd taken up such extreme habits. She stared back at him with those bright eyes, they were innocent, as if he hadn't just snorted a line of Prozac off the coffee table. She took her finger and whisked up the remainder of it. "Sweet." She said licking her lips. "How was it…outside?" Sango asked curiously as she took a swig of Miroku's homemade liquor. Kagome gazed at her through her drug induced haze. "It was lovely. I met so many interesting people. It was easy there, not as real ya know." She mused as she slid further down in her seat. "Why'd they kick you out?" Koga asked sorting through Naraku's collection of records. Kagome grinned. "It's kind of a funny story actually. You know I was depressed because my mom was getting sicker and so I started taking these sedatives and I would fall asleep in class and so I failed all of my exams." She said without taking a breath. "Cool." Koga said simply. Inuyasha remained quite all night, which was unlike him. He didn't particularly like this side of her being evoked. "You guys are busted." Narakus mom feigned discipline jokingly as she came across the teenagers strung-out in her living room. "Fuck off Mother." Naraku grimaced as always when she attempted to converse with his friends. "Don't talk to your mother that way." His father came out soon after, wearing just a silk robe. He hugged his mother from behind, and she gasped excitedly. "Both of you can fuck off." He grumbled irritably. "Is that Kagome? Honey look it's Kagome." She noticed the pretty raven haired girl sitting beside her son on the couch. "How's your mom sweetheart?" she asked like any friends mother would. "She's okay." She lied more to herself than anyone else. "That's great. You are just as gorgeous as I remember. Isn't she honey." Narakus mother cooed, holding on to her heart shaped face. "Out! Out! Out!" Naraku demanded adamantly. "Don't have too much fun." His father winked before closing the sliding door behind himself. Naraku shuddered at his parents' blatant sexuality. "I promised mom, I'd be home for dinner. Walk me home?" Sango piped up, patting Miroku's inner thigh. "Yeah babes. You coming Yash?" Miroku questioned, drawing him out of that coma like state he'd been in. He saw Naraku knot his hands in Kagomes hair and that was it. "Yeah." He mumbled dejectedly, finding a way to hold himself together. "She moves pretty fast." Miroku muttered playfully, once they dropped Sango off for the night. He was referring to Kagome. Inuyasha still looked like he'd taken a kick in the face. "Don't even worry about it man. She fucks with everybody, you know that." Miroku tried to console him. Even he had been victim to her sidelong glances and lack of inhibition at one point. That was of course before he and Sango decided to commit. "Yeah…but it's my window that she crawls through at night. It's me that listens to her cry, and all that shit. Me." He said angrily, kicking a cycling bin full of glass bottles. That's where all the pain stemmed from.

"I didn't want to go home." Her voice startled him as he took of his hoodie, and attempted to distress for the night. He looked at her quizzically; she was perched on his bed like it was the most natural thing. Like he hadn't just seen her be intimate with someone else. "What about your mom?" he asked standing clear of her slightly. "She's sleeping. She whispered edging closer to him. She tugged at his belt loops suggestively. "Naraku." He reminded her as she kissed the side of his mouth. "I wanna sleep with you tonight." She said with a slight urgency. He let her unbutton his jeans, and marveled once she dropped her breezy summer dress to his bedroom floor. He was crazy for letting this happen over and over again. Since they were thirteen, and Kagome had been the first girl around the place to give it up to his older brother. But that was in the past. They never spoke of it again, except maybe in passing. Or as a fond memory of the past. "You can do whatever you want to me." She whispered to him as he backed her towards his unmade bed. The hollowness in her eyes scared him for a second.

They both wished it could be this calm forever. Neither of them minded that huge swell of silence that came in and out like sleep sometimes did. She would stare off into space, while he traced patterns from his imagination on her skin. "Don't you wish sometimes, that you could go back, to when you hadn't lost anything? You know what I mean." Kagome's voice chimed sullenly to her one and only confidant. It had always been this way. She would spout dark things like that, and Inuyasha would tease her for being so gloomy. "Yeah." He agreed with her this time. "Help me understand." He piped up again after she had been quiet for too long. "You'll never know what it feels like to watch a piece of you die slowly every day." She stared at him impassively. Then a slow smile spread across her face. "That was really morbid." She admitted it herself. Inuyasha chuckled uneasily. She was starting to scare him. "Herbal tea?" his mother barged into his room with this offering. She sat on the edge of his bed, and poured three cups. "Thank you." Kagome smiled sitting up in bed. "Mom?" Inuyasha gritted his teeth impatiently. "I just want to catch up with Kagome. It's been almost a year since I've seen her. How are you baby doll?" his mother asked, sipping her tea, and giving those doe eyes of hers. "I've been good. It's nice to be back after so long." She said pleasantly. "Well I'm glad you're back. Maybe you can get this one here to have some sort of direction with his life. All he ever does is brood." His mom teased playfully, before leaving them alone again. "We were made for each other." She joked finishing off her tea. He took it to heart though.


	3. Chapter 3

She had been content with living her life so far away from everyone she knew. Nobody outside knew that her mother was sick, or that she had been a terrible daughter lately. Just avoiding, and avoiding. It was easier there, like she had said. Less real. Bankotsu, the nice housing advisor that provided her with some form of companionship that she had missed living around this place, he sent a letter in the mail. That was probably the only thing she missed about living here. The distractions of people. "Honey. I'm okay." She heard her mother's voice struggle to say. Her sister Kikyo was hoisting her up, off the kitchen floor. There was blood streaming down her face. From her nose. Kagome watched from the concealed arch way. Brain hemorrhages could be a real bitch. "I don't mind being here with you mom. You don't have to pretend you're okay." Kikyo's voice lectured firmly, as she eased her frail mother into a chair. "Where's Kagome?" she asked slightly irritably before the queen of elusive slipped out the side door. She ran towards something she wasn't quite sure of.

"I couldn't even imagine what that's like. Losing my mom." Sango sympathized with Kagome's situation. She never knew someone so close to death in her life. Except when they were younger and they found that dead horse on the side of the road. But that was different. And when Inuyasha's grandfather passed away. But that was different too. "Yeah." Miroku mused deeply as they sat in the old tree house, which had become the drug den in recent years. Inuyasha just stared at the ceiling. She hadn't been at the shrine looking after her mom. God only knew what she was up to. An image of a burning effigy flashed in his mind for some reason. "Knock knock." She appeared at the door in the floor. "Hey Kagome." Sango felt obliged to greet her enthusiastically. She smiled serenely. "I haven't been up here since we were kids." She remembered fondly. She sat down beside Inuyasha and leaned against him affectionately. It was the stuff like that, those things that blurred the lines for him. "What's up?" she whispered sweetly to him. "Nothing." He lied.

Through the bonfire he stared at her. She was letting the gloom take over her life again. Like it would be any different here then it was anywhere else. It was worse here. He was beginning to realize that now. Getting expelled was the worst thing for her. It meant she had to deal with things. He hated seeing her like that. Pounding down beers, and letting Koga throw himself allover her. He ended up leaving with the merry couple again. This was becoming to habitual. Kagome found herself completely alone, sitting in the sand. Koga went off somewhere, puking. And Naraku had passed out a long time ago. She was just finishing off the bottle of jack on her own. "Hello stranger." Some voice startled her out of her dark mind. This figure was walking towards her, down the beach. She smiled once she recognized who it was. "Sesshomaru." She cooed affectionately, leaping up to hug him. He chuckled and spun her around. "What are you doing here?" she asked dubiously as they lazed in the sand beside each other. He took a swig of the bottle too. "Visiting the fam. You know how it is." He said jokingly. "What about you? I thought you were at that Swiss boarding school or something." Kagome laughed. "San Diego." She corrected him. "And I got expelled." Her voice had a subtle tinge of regret. "Are you glad to be back?" he asked her pointedly. "Are you?" she challenged him. He chuckled. "Fuck no." They both busted into laughter. "Home sweet home." She chimed satirically. Sesshomaru took a hard swig and grimaced. "This place isn't home." He muttered. Finally. Someone that got it. They stared at each other pensively. "Come on." She stood up on the beach and held her hand out to him. She was teetering. "You are wasted." He chuckled as she fell against him. Not that he minded. When she was kissing on his neck the fact that his little brother harbored such strong feelings for this girl didn't even cross his mind. "You're bad." He laughed lightly as she unzipped his windbreaker. It comforted her, the fact that he didn't even mention her mom the way everyone else did.


	4. Chapter 4

All the sudden homecomings had excited everyone a little bit. Only since nothing remotely interesting ever happened, aside from people rejoining the cult. That's the way it seemed anyways. He was having one of those far off dreams again. Everything was blurry. Like he was seeing things through a grimy filter. "Little brother. It's midday." Some voice pulled him out of the murky water. It was water. He had been drowning, and hadn't even realized it. "Sesshomaru?" he questioned groggily, as he sat up in bed. Alone this time. His older brother was grinning down on him, towel drying his distinctive mane. "When'd you get here?" he asked fondly, glad that his big brother could take a break from his exciting life in Nashville to visit every once in a while. He visited once, and it had proved to be an adventure. Sesshomaru shared an apartment in a rundown complex with an ex junkie musician and a broke philosophy major. "Like late last night. I only saw Kagome though." He smirked at the memory, shaking his head slightly. "She really is something." He chuckled lightly ruffling his brother's hair. "What do you mean?" Inuyasha laughed lightly sitting up further in bed. "We were just catching up. You know how that goes." He said suggestively, waggling his eyebrows. Inuyasha couldn't believe what he was hearing. "She was coming onto me so hard man. Like you wouldn't believe. Then we really got into it, and she was like moaning 'Harder. Harder.' And begging for it and shit. I got her ass limping. Swear to god." He boasted proudly of his conquest. He stared off into space for a minute, savoring the satisfaction he still felt. "Get dressed. We're putting that prick Naraku out of business today." He encouraged before walking out of the bedroom they shared through childhood. Inuyasha fell back against his mattress. He felt himself breathing harder, clenching his comforter in his fists.

The tone for the day had already been set. It had been cast in stone for what seemed like a thousand years, and there was no undoing it. "I'm telling you, this is the best quality shit you're going to get anywhere. Guaranteed." He was drifting in and out of Sesshomaru's sales pitch to Koga and his band. Ginta continued to do guitar riffs which were slightly annoying. "I don't know bro. Naraku sells some premium shit." Koga hemmed and hawed. "That's the only shit you know. Live a little." He pressured further. "How much?" he finally budged. "Hey you guys." Sango greeted as she and Kagome entered Koga's shed. It appeared to be the hangout spot for the day. Inuyasha sat stone faced. He didn't respond to her hushed 'What's up?' and when she sat on his lap, he shoved her away and walked out into Koga's garden. "Don't touch me." He growled when she caught up to him and tugged on his Ramones t-shirt. "Don't fucking touch me." He pushed her away again. "What did I do?" she asked sadly, holding back her tears bravely. "You know what you did." He accused sharply, his eyes had so much hate in them. It tore her up inside. She was weeping now. "My fucking brother." He said with disgust. He was disgusted. He was sure everybody could hear them. But he didn't care. "I bet he fucked you real good huh? Sideways and how ever the fuck else you like it. Fucking whore." He said coldly. "Just because you're mom is dying doesn't give you the right to slut around. To fuck anything that moves." He continued with the verbal barbs. She screamed at him, and slapped and shoved him before running off somewhere. Inuyasha kicked the side of Koga's shed and a rack of ceramic flower pots. "Fuck." He groaned, running his hands through his hair in distress.

He had shunned himself to his bedroom all night in self-imposed exile. This didn't make up for anything though. "Can we talk?" he heard his brothers voice calling to him from the bed on the other side of the room. Inuyasha stared up at the ceiling despondently. He had to share a room with the traitor. He almost forgot of his existence. "Seriously bro. I had no idea you fucked with Kagome like that. She's always been like everybody's girlfriend. Just a slut, you know." He attempted to justify his great betrayal. He got no response. It was the middle of the night, but he didn't care. He went out for a walk, to nowhere in particular.


	5. Chapter 5

"I didn't think you'd come here." Her voice sounded meekly from the darkness of the tree house. He hadn't expected her either. But there she was, sitting there, crying, with a cigarette poised between her dainty fingers. "You don't have to leave." She sniffled as he began to climb back down the ladder. He hesitated at first, then climbed up and closed the escape hatch behind him. He couldn't look at her. Obviously he had done something wrong, which excused her wrong all together, as always. He wasn't so angry anymore. Just depressed, and very confused. Kagome was staring out the window, towards the sky, with all the stars, and the swelled up moon. "I remember when we were like thirteen, and you told me you loved after we had sex up here. That was one of the happiest nights of my life I think." She smiled knowing he was gazing at her. She stared at him with those intense blue eyes of hers, and it was almost like all was forgotten. Almost. He never loved anyone else. Only her, and somehow she used that against him. "Why him? Why my brother of all people. I didn't care so much with Naraku and the other guys. Even Miroku. But that's my brother Kagome." He said heartbreakingly. She shook her head. "I just don't want to belong to anyone." She said as if it were that simple. He didn't know what to say to that. "You see what our parents are like Inuyasha. Why would I want that?" she asked rhetorically. "How is that even fair Kagome? You keep shitting all over me. Maybe it's my fault. I guess I like the abuse." He mumbled inwardly. "If you want for something, you won't get it. And then you get hurt. It's a vicious cycle, really." Her voice had a contemplative tone. Like she was speaking from experience or something. Because no matter how hard she wished for things to be different, they just weren't. "I'm not supposed to want you?" he asked despondently. "No." she said, deadpan. He stared at her for a long time, mystified. He woke up alone in the tree house, not even sure if that exchange ever even occurred.

Talk was cheap. Sesshomaru apologized and everything for what happened between him and Kagome, but that didn't stop him from hanging out with her. Well his definition of hanging out with girls, which really didn't involve much hanging out at all. There they all were, in Sango's backyard at her family's bimonthly bonfire. Everybody was all laid out on the beach, as carefree as can be. Sango couldn't help but feel pity for her good friend. Lately he looked so…miserable. "Dance with me Sango." Kagome enchanted her like she did with everyone, and pulled her into a pseudo erotic dance in the sand. They both giggled when a slow song came on, but continued with their dancing. "We haven't really talked or hung out since I've been back." Kagome mentioned emptily as her wild waves blew in the breeze. "I know right." Sango feigned disappointment. They weren't even really that close to begin with. They were friends by default, always thrown together because of the guys they hung out with. "How's Miroku doing, he looks really good these days." Kagome said suggestively, she lacked the boundaries, others were born with. That's the thing that made her so uneasy about Kagome, she could get whatever she wanted. "You think?" she asked as if it didn't bother her. Kagome nodded. "What about you and Sesshomaru? Flavor of the week?" Sango asked slyly slipping in contempt. Kagome hummed. "I don't really label really great sex." She smirked, irritating Sango further. "Really? He probably has a lot of experience from fucking all those whores right?" she asked innocently enough. Kagome stared at her ponderously. "He was telling all the guys how he fucked you so hard he sprained your hip. He said that's why you were limping." She informed her coolly. Kagome didn't break her composure. "Whores? Like prostitutes?" she asked calmly, continuing their waltz. Sango nodded. "He told the Miroku and the guys, and Miroku tells me everything." She said almost joyfully. Kagome considered that for a moment. "Did he tell you that I give the best head, hands down." She whispered. Sango pulled away from her, and walked over to where Miroku and Koga were congregating by the stereo system. She looked over at Kagome scornfully, and tucked herself under Miroku's arm. Kagome smiled at her, then set off to find Sesshomaru.

"What the fuck Sesshomaru? What the fuck have you been telling the guys about me?" she hollered at the clearly inebriated young man. His eyes were glassy and his smile, goofy. "Huh?" he asked dumbly as she shoved him against Sango's bathroom door. "You told the guys that I was limping because we had rough sex or something." She accused, obviously hurt. "Chill out babes. Here I have this E. Can we take it and just like vibe each other." He said, handing her a little tablet. Kagome took it, anything to escape. "I'm gonna snort this if you don't mind." He bent over the bathroom counter and did a crushed up line of ecstasy. "So is it true?" Kagome menaced him slightly. "What?" he asked, throwing his head back. Pure nirvana. He couldn't fully hear what she was saying. She was fading in and out, her voice anyway. "What are you saying Kagome? Kagome?" he asked laughing, as tears rolled down her cheeks. "How could you?" he heard her sob. "How could I what?" he asked, reaching for her through the density. And then suddenly she was herself again. Staring at him with those seductive eyes. "You know what Sesshomaru?" her voice resonated off the walls. "I'm at my sexual peek, right now." She whispered, beckoning him forward towards her. "Really?" he chuckled intertwining his hands with hers. She nodded carefully. They walked out looking blissful, and disheveled. "About time." Sango's father postured, as the bathroom became available again.


	6. Chapter 6

He would just be some directionless loser. Maybe. Forever maybe too. He could hear them through the thin walls, laughing and shuffling around downstairs. That's what he hated most about this stupid fucking house. No matter where you were, you could hear everything. Then the noises got much closer and his bedroom door swung open. "Good morning!" Kagome's voice chimed happily plopping down on his bed. He looked over at his alarm clock. It was only 3 AM. Inuyasha observed her quickly, she probably dropped acid or something. "What did you give her?" he asked his brother angrily as he stood in the doorway of their shared bedroom. He had this pleased look on his face, and flask filled with what smelled like Miroku's homemade whisky in the other. "Just a little mood enhancer. Relax little bro." he pleaded for serenity. Kagome had this glassy look in her eyes, she was transfixed by the feel of his skin. "Soft." Murmured letting her fingers skim across his neck. He just let her do it. He let her do whatever she wanted. Sesshomaru put on some music; he was pretty out of it too. "I don't fucking believe this." Inuyasha grumbled as the two of them began to dance together. Kagome looked like a blur of hair and hands, and his brother just looked like a creepy pervert. "Dance with us!" she prompted him urgently tugging on his arm like a three year old until he just gave in. Until she was sandwiched between the two brothers. She was looking at him with those wild eyes, staring deep into his fucking soul as she grinded against his brothers' crouch. Their hands overlapped around her waist, and Inuyasha instinctively pulled away. Kagome held onto him firmly, his brother was kissing on her neck and moving her thick waves out of the way. She seemed to be enjoying, but still she wanted more. She kissed him on the lips fully. He wanted to push her away. He wanted this to be some fucked up nightmare. "See. We can share her. Like when we were kids." Sesshomaru reasoned with his brother, the solution to all their troubles. "Just take turns?" Inuyasha half considered it as the only love of his life was standing there before him, presenting herself so openly. Sesshomaru nodded "Me first." He sounded like an immature kid. He wanted his turn with her, just like old times. There always used to be a gathering of teenaged boys just hanging around her. All the time, he remembered. All those fucking memories. He was staring down at her, watching her get fucked by his older brother. Probably not the first time tonight either. It disgusted him. He felt sick to his stomach for wanting his turn next. He couldn't see Kagome in her eyes anymore. All he saw were massive dilated pupils and emptiness. "This is so fucked up." He finally uttered gravely. Her moans and pleads were piercing, and they panged at his heart strings. He turned off the obnoxious music and started breaking shit. "Whoa, baby bro. Chill out." Sesshomaru chimed in that content sort of way. "No!" Inuyasha hollered rightfully. "You have fucking problems. Both of you." He came to that realization. He wasn't odd for wanting to get away from here. These people…they were…empty. "I can't believe I used to look up to you. You're such a fucking joke. A junkie, and a thief and a liar." He accused his older brother sharply. "What did you come back here for anyway? I'm sure there are plenty of whores in Nashville." Sesshomaru didn't have anything to say. He was just smiling dumbly and ruffling his sweat matted hair. "Fuck it. I don't care." He growled harshly storming out of that stuffy bedroom, and running. There was nowhere to run to. Shit, he thought.

She woke up feeling worse than ever. Weak and tired from whatever drug Sesshomaru had given her. They were probably laced with meth or something. She decided she hated Sesshomaru today. Especially after waking up next to him naked. He had this smug sleeping face on. She punched him on the arm. "Morning lover." He greeted her cheerfully, as he took in their surroundings. "I guess we had a good fucking night." He chuckled picking up his flask from his bedside table and shaking it. Kagome rolled her eyes. "I feel like absolute shit." She grumbled as she tried to regain her equilibrium. She glanced over at the empty bed in the corner. She worried what Inuyasha would think about this. She worried what he thought all the time. "I have to go home." Were her parting words as she gathered her things in shame. That was the thing about depending on drugs for happiness. Their effects faded away. She felt it though. The moment she turned the knob to the French doors. She felt that loss. Her sister was slouched at the kitchen table with her back to the doors. She was quivering, and when the doors creaked open she locked tearful eyes with her younger sister. She had to see for herself though, just to be sure. And seeing her mother with a white sheet pulled over her, made her wish she'd avoided home all together.

"I've been looking for you everywhere." Kagome sighed in relief as she came upon Inuyasha sitting on the beach completely alone. He didn't look too happy to see her, and she wondered how that could be. She sat down beside him and tried to rest against him. She tried to pull him into her suffering because she knew he was the only one that could pull her out again. He glared at her, makeup smeared and all. "What do you want from me Kagome?" he asked bluntly, he was fed up with her careless antics. He enabled her too much. "Say that you love Me." She whispered in desperation, he wouldn't hold her back. His arms were stiff and unmoving, and his hand was clutching the sand tightly. He squinted up at the sun. "You don't know what love is. You don't know how to love anything." He assured her menacingly. "That's not true." She defended weakly, feeling her heart leaking all of a sudden. She couldn't handle him rejecting her, not now. Kagome shook her head slowly. "You don't even realize what you do Kagome. You need fucking professional help okay, because I just can't handle you anymore." He refused to let her in again. After last night he was pretty much done with her. "Whatever I did I'm sorry!" she hollered after him as he walked away from her. "I'm sorry I got fucked up okay!" she screamed, and cried until she felt her throat swelling up with gull. She was wiping her tears as she ran into the ocean. She just ran until she felt the tide sweeping her away. Maybe she could join her mother in heaven now too. She couldn't be here anymore. So she stayed like a stone in the middle of the ocean being pushed about, almost drowning, until someone pulled her out again. It was Miroku, she could hear his deep voice calling out to her. He was breathing the life back into her, and stroking her face carefully. She could hear him perfectly, but she just wanted to be dead for a little bit longer. "I don't know man, I was fucking getting ready to surf and I saw her out there." His voice boomed wavering the slightest bit. His hand was warm against her clammy skin. She meant to die out there.


	7. Chapter 7

Living here had become too much as of lately. He sort of wished he'd bothered to do well in school so he could even have a shot and going to some far away school. Iceland would be perfect right about now. But L.A. would do. He decided it would be great, living with Koga and Ginta and their shitty band as they tried to make it big or whatever. They made it sound cool. "We got this loft in an abandoned warehouse. No rent, all the hooch you can drink. "Koga continued to list all the benefits of itinerate life. Inuyasha smiled as they sat in his smoke filled shed. "Sounds awesome." He mused taking another hit of the numbing herb. "Do you think I could come with you guys?" he asked, only slightly apprehensive. "Hell yeah. The more the merrier." Koga responded without hesitation. And he meant it too. They exchanged their age old playground handshake and laughed it off, soaking up the bliss that came with endless possibilities. Koga was positive the band could make it out there. Inuyasha believed in pretty much anything at this point. As typical, the day got away from them.

"So you're pissing off for good huh?" Sesshomaru prodded his younger brother coolly, as he watched him pack up everything he owned into a backpack. "Yeah, and so should you." Inuyasha shot back sharply; he was still fuming about last night. "I will soon enough." He assured him, not taking his brothers anger to heart. He was upset with him, and it was completely justified. Sesshomaru hesitated for a second. "What about Kagome?" He asked simply knowing that would slow him down if only little. Inuyasha stopped packing for a second, but then he started back up again. He didn't speak. He knew by now everything that happened. How Miroku had to practically fish her out of the ocean. He knew her mom was dead, but it was too late to cradle her. She was too fucking broken to salvage at this point. He put on his backpack and gave Sesshomaru one last withering look before walking out. "You have to forgive me someday little brother." He hollered after him, only hearing the slamming of the front door in response. He had about 700 dollars in his pocket, access to his father's bank account, and all of his worldly possessions strapped to his back. "You ready?" Koga asked as he sat in the idling van parked outside his house. His former house. Inuyasha nodded. "Yup." And he climbed into the back of the half restored junkyard van with the band's name painted on the side of it. Corporal Punishment. He hoped the van would make it through the 5 hour drive.

There was nothing left here, and she knew that now. She knew it all. She had died and come back and now she was at peace with the way things were. Inuyasha was gone without saying goodbye, but she understood why. She hurt him bad. He was much better off in the long run. But this past week had been lonely. She avoided contact with people and stayed in her room pondering things. She talked to her mom a lot to. Asked questions mostly. Questions she knew the answers to. "Hey what's up Kagome?" Miroku asked half nervous, half pleased to see her. She shrugged standing out on his front porch. "I just wanted to say thanks I guess. For like saving me." She offered up politely. He scratched the back of his head. "No problem" he said kindly, looking down at her. She stood there for a minute, wanting to ask the important questions. "They're in L.A. I don't know the exact address though." He sensed her concern. She looked down at her bare feet for a moment before looking back up at Miroku. She was crushed, and he saw it written all over her face. She nodded firmly feeling the tears coming on again. "Thanks, again." She uttered sadly before beginning to walk away. "He didn't say goodbye to me either." He informed her, feeling sad about it too. That was his best friend since they were in the womb and he just up and left. Kagome threw a weak smile over her shoulder before walking off again. She needed to fuck off too. She needed to go away somewhere so badly it ached. She was relieved to see him, happy even. Happy that he hadn't left yet. "When are you going back to Nashville?" she asked solemnly, sitting on his bed, trying hard to avoid looking at the empty one in the corner. Sesshomaru was packing a duffle bag. He had so much weed it was ridiculous. "Tonight, actually." He smirked. Kagome eased herself back and tried to relax. "There's no fucking enterprise here. My business is suffering." He mumbled agonized over the amount of money he'd put into this. He managed to swindle his father out of a couple thousand though, but that was beside the point. "It's dead here." Kagome completely agreed with him. The nearest Wal-Mart was about an hour and half away. She just watched him pack though. Until the room was devoid of any traces of either brother. It was like the rain washed them away. "I want to leave too. Can come with you?" she asked twiddling her thumbs because she was nervous. He abruptly stopped packing, and gave her this quizzical look. "Seriously?" he didn't know what to make of it. Kagome nodded meekly. "Of course! That'd be fucking sweet!" He chimed excitedly, neglecting his bags completely, nearly pouncing on top of her. He kissed her, happy that she was so willing to go along with him. She was the reason he'd stuck around for this long in the first place. She smiled at his excitement. "You're gonna love it. So much fucking freedom out there." He promised genuinely, as he stared into her misting eyes. She was tempted to look away, and avert her eyes somehow. That's how Inuyasha used to look at her. "So much beauty." He whispered, not even remembering what he was talking about. Kagome nodded, it would be good to get away.


	8. Chapter 8

"How selfish can you be?" her sisters voice was harsh, and heavy with judgment. Kagome didn't respond, she kept her back towards the door and continued to pack not giving herself the time to wimp out. "We just buried our mother, and you're already skipping town. That's so fucking typical." Kikyo shook her head; it was the stuff like this that made her resent her little sister slightly. "Spare me." Kagome muttered tonelessly as she continued to shove balled up articles of clothing into an old backpack. Kikyo was beginning to get fed up with this, with her constant avoidance of things. She always ran away from her problems, for as long as they both could remember. "You never face your problems. You didn't help take care of mom or anything. You did nothing, less than nothing actually. It's about time I call you out on your shit." She tried to keep her tone level, but Kagome was effectively ignoring her so she got slightly more pissed off. "Will you fucking stop and look at me!" she screamed shoving her to jolt her out of that pouty little defiance. "You're psycho." Kagome tried to laugh it off, plopping onto her bed with subtle grace. She stared up at Kikyo with those intense orbs, speculating. "What is it then?" she piped up after it was silent for too long. "She's gone, get over it. I'm moving on, and so should you." She said coldly, standing up to leave. "Moving on?" Kikyo scoffed blatantly. "You call running of with Sesshomaru moving on? He's a loser, and I'd rather you realize that now then be miserable later." She softened her voice only slightly. Kagome shook her head. "I'm a loser too, I guess. Besides, I'm already miserable." She sounded so defeated at this point, and it was crushing to hear. It had been so hard for her to watch the train wreck that had been Kagome's life these past few months. She hated herself for waiting this long to reach out to her. Waiting until it was too late. "You're not a loser Kagome. Please just, listen to me. Don't go." Kikyo was pleading. "I'm here okay, and I love you. And I'm sorry I've been so distant. You don't have to leave." She held onto either side of her little sisters face, trying to find the warmth somewhere behind her glassy eyes. Kagome shrugged away from her touch. "You just don't want to be alone." She accused sharply. "You don't care about me, and you didn't care about mom either. You just wanted her to die so you wouldn't have to take care of her anymore. You're just a frigid bitch Kikyo." She spat these words laced with venom and malice, almost like she couldn't control her own mouth. She had to burn these bridges. Kikyo was reeling, and before she knew it she had slapped Kagome clear across the face. They were both shocked, but Kikyo was able to compose herself quickly, there was no better time to break the truth to her then now. "I'm selling the shrine, the land, everything. So there's no place to come back to." She admitted coldly. Kagome remained silent, and held onto her cheek which burned bright red. She was choking back tears as she listened. "You were coming to live in New York with me, private tutor, G.E.D., whatever you wanted to do. I guess that's not gonna happen." She said simply before leaving the room altogether. She knew there was nothing else she could do to stop Kagome when she was riled up like this. She would just keep running until she finally got tired. And when that point came, she knew where to find her. Kagome sank to the floor and cried. There was nothing to keep her from leaving now.

They had booked a gig. Finally, after all this promoting on street corners and sketchy house parties. Somebody was actually willing to pay for them to perform after hearing the astonishingly lo-fi demo recorded by a fucking laptop. Those four songs, the only songs they had ever written raw and uncut in all of their unpolished and sucky glory. It was great. "Look at all these fucking hipsters." Koga uttered in disgust taking swigs of the free beer they were offered. Inuyasha shook his head in amusement, they grumbled about having such a pretentious crowd but they accepted the cash and perks that came with it. "You have to do sound check." He reminded him casually, having been the bands unofficial manager for some time now. He was the only one with enough math skills to keep track of the money they made so they trusted him to it. Koga and the rest of the guys trudged on stage grudgingly and began some random riffs and vocals. They were making 500 bucks tonight. Plus the free drinks and food and shit. So far L.A. had been everything that Koga had promised it would be. "Are you with the band?" this voice hollered over the ear splitting music. Koga's waling elicited cringing from Inuyasha, but their sound had improved somewhat. He looked down at this girl with blunt blonde bangs that covered her dull eyes. "Yeah." He said simply motioning towards his official Corporal Punishment t-shirt. It was the only one they could afford to make. Some art student that Koga had been sleeping with designed it. "Cool, these guys are awesome. They have such a raw sound." She mused deeply. Inuyasha smirked. He watched her stand there and text on her iPhone as she bobbed her head subtly. "So what are you like their roadie or something?" she asked giving him this inquisitive look. "Manager, agent, childhood friend." He corrected her, letting his arrogance seep through. She gave him her full attention then. "Do you think you could introduce me?" she was unable to keep her cool. Inuyasha postured "I don't know…" he feigned disinterest, this was always his favorite part of the job. "Please? I would do anything." She assured him desperately, giving him that wispy look the groupies always used. She led him to the grimy club bathroom, and that was that. As he was fucking her against the stall wall he read the dirty bathroom graffiti.

The open road was calming, and refreshing, and beautiful all at once. Just like Sesshomaru said it would be. They took her mom's old station wagon and drove off like it was nothing. It was fun every night, and the freedom, it was just so free out there. The weather was pleasant and everything was beautiful. "Don't fall asleep." Sesshomaru teased her playfully, touching her vulnerable face. The sun was setting on this day and she was leaning all of her weight on the passenger door. She perked up slightly and smiled holding onto his hand as they drove. "Look what I got at the last gas station." He chimed happily as he flung the baggy of ecstasy tablets onto the dashboard. His eyes shifted from the road, to Kagome's eager face. They both saw the illuminated Sky Ranch Motel sign blinking as they passed it by. "Pull over." Kagome commanded excitedly, Sesshomaru complied and made a sharp illegal U-turn in the middle of the vacant road. "Welcome to the Sky Ranch. What can I do for you?" a stout man with a hilariously affected southern accent greeted them. Sesshomaru grinned impishly. "My wife and I would like a room please." He put on an adult persona, and jokingly pulled Kagome into an embrace. She giggled uncontrollably. "Anything specific?" the man asked, skeptically observing the young couple. "I don't know? The honeymoon suite?" Sesshomaru chuckled looking down at Kagome. "I have to carry you over the threshold." He gave warning before hoisting her up, and barreling into the dimly lit bedroom. "Seriously?" Kagome laughed noticing there was a mirror positioned on the ceiling above the heart shaped bed. Sesshomaru laughed too, plopping down on top of her after removing his hoodie and shoes. He was looking into her eyes trying to communicate something. Kagome looked away. "How about some candy?" She reminded him of the distraction she'd grown fond of lately. He placed a little pill on his tongue, and leaned in to kiss her. She let him do it his way, because pretty soon she'd be flying and it wouldn't matter, those looks he was giving her. "Let's take a bath." He prompted, not feeling as disoriented yet because he was so much bigger than her. She smiled letting him slip each layer from her body, all those clothes had been bothersome anyway. It felt like liquid gold, all that water around the two of them. It moved, and she could feel each individual cell, each particle. "This is incredible." She praised the effects that washed over her, letting her head roll back. Sesshomaru chuckled propping her up against himself. He pressed his forehead to hers and sent those vibes he lived by. "We could end wars with this stuff." His voice sounded further and further away. It echoed and bounced off the tiles and walls. He was probably right about that though.


	9. Chapter 9

"How are you? You fucking asshole." Miroku shouted affectionately as he pulled Inuyasha into a tight squeeze. "I missed you too you fucking idiot." Inuyasha hollered back, causing a scene in the middle of the bus station. Sango stood by smiling at the display. Miroku had been moping around for days, bored out of his mind now that the majority of his friends had moved out here to Los Angeles. Somehow he convinced her to come along with him even though she knew deep down this was it. She would have to call her mom at some point to let her know this wasn't just a weekend trip like she had promised. "Sango!" the greetings continued, as Inuyasha pulled his childhood friend into a tight embrace. She giggled. "It's not the same back home without you." She admitted returning the affection. And it wasn't. It was practically a ghost town, more so than before. "Hands off my woman." Miroku teased as he grabbed their bags off the ground. Inuyasha laughed as he ruffled Sango's hair despite her protest. It was the three of them again, like it had been for a good while. The nostalgia was a nice sweeping feeling. It was a nice change of pace from all of the debauchery this place had to offer. "Alright, are you guys ready to get fucked up?" he chimed excitedly as he loaded their stuff into the bands van. "Yeah, Sango said she's down to do some coke too." Miroku joked earning himself a punch in the arm. 'We've got plenty of that." Inuyasha said in all seriousness. "Word?" Miroku questioned dubiously. He nodded. "You are not doing coke babe." Sango scolded him from the backseat. "Awe, come on. We're in Hollywood." He postured with grand gestures. Inuyasha smirked at their exchange. Some things just never changed. "Is this the guys?" Sango poked her head between the two of them to get closer to the radio. "Oh, yeah. It's their new E.P. we just burned a few copies." Inuyasha informed her as he turned up the C.D. Sango nodded her head to it slightly. "They don't suck as much as they used to." She acknowledged their progress as musicians. "Yeah, Koga sounds pretty good actually." Miroku chimed in, pleasantly surprised. Inuyasha nodded as he lit a cigarette. "Yeah, they signed with some label, and they're working on a few more E.P.s right now. It's been pretty sweet." He sort of basked in the glory of the past few months. He didn't have to do much work anymore considering they were signed artists now. He got enjoy the fringe benefits though, the parties, the groupies, the drugs, the booze. All of it. It was a pretty good way of life he'd found for himself. And now that his best friend was here it could only get better. He couldn't muster up the courage to ask what he really wanted to though. He wanted to know how Kagome was doing. How she was coping with his absence and all, because as much as he didn't want to be concerned with her he always was. He thought about her constantly. Miroku knew him well enough though. He could see the way he tensed up all of a sudden. He used to chain smoke because of her. "I'm pretty sure she's in New York with her sister." He lied just to spare the poor guys feelings. He knew how devastated he would be if he knew the truth, if he knew that she ran off with his brother after all that. "They sold the shrine to some land developers. They're gonna turn it into a spa or some shit." He sort of laughed about it. Sango observed Inuyasha carefully as he took in the information. He lit yet another cigarette. "Cool." He muttered as they sat in traffic in the blistering heat. Nothing could really ease his mind off the subject though because he knew what a mess she had been. He thoroughly regretted the way he had treated her the last time they ever spoke. The way he pushed her away and refused to offer her comfort in her time of need. Sometimes he thought about doing things differently, taking her back to his house and fixing her up. He shook those thoughts from his head quickly; if he kept this up he'd be a sad drunk tonight.

It was like time had broken for her. Or the controls to her life had been set on some weird setting that allowed her to see outside of herself. Maybe it was all the drugs. She was seeing her childhood for some reason; it was like a television show all the happy moments. Her mother was there, and her dad was too before he passed away. She tried to hold onto that brief period in time where she could remember being truly happy. She was about five or six years old, and Kikyo was ten. They would all sit around, while their father made up nursery rhymes with their names in them. Mom would sing too sometimes, and she had the most beautiful voice she remembered. "Kagome." She heard this voice calling to her from beyond her childhood memories. She didn't want to leave this happiness behind yet so she tried her hardest to ignore it. She sat on her mother's lap, and snuggled close to her. She was warm and smelled like sweet summer air. "Wake up, sweetheart." Her mother said kindly as she touched her face. And she was unpleasantly jolted back into real life again. "Fuck, Kagome you scared the shit out of me." Sesshomaru breathed as her eyes fluttered open again. "She alright man?" his roommate asked as he stood in the doorway with the ice cold water Sesshomaru had commanded him to get. "Yeah, thanks." He was still shaken. She had been completely unresponsive, and her skin had gone cold. "I want to do it again." She whispered desperately as she wiped the sweat from her forehead. "Later okay, I thought you overdosed or something. Let's just take it easy right now." He tried to reason with her as she attempted to stand up. She was still pretty fucked up from what he could gather. "I don't need to take it easy." She tried to downplay her level of inebriation. She sat on the edge of the bed, and ran her fingers through her hair. "I'm okay, really. That shit was incredible, you did good babes." She commended him holding onto either side of his face. She stroked his scruffy beard, and planted a kiss on his lips. "I'm okay, I swear." She assured him, looking deep within his eyes. He studied her closely, he couldn't detect anything unusual so he smiled and kissed her back. "I'll set it up." He promised as he smoothed down her hair affectionately. "I love you so much." He whispered severely, looking her straight in the eye. His gaze burned through to her soul. She cracked a sweet smile. "I know."

"You don't look so good, Princess." Someone took notice to her fading interest in tonight's festivities. What was the occasion again? Just a Thursday night. Kagome shrugged taking a swig of her beer. What she needed was another fix of that shit Sesshomaru gave her the other night. She never really saw herself becoming a habitual drug user, but then again it wasn't something to strive for. Sesshomaru made it seem alright though, he was pretty intelligent and he was able to function like a semi-normal human being. "Thanks, Tyler." She muttered sarcastically after a minute. He smiled stupidly; he was pretty drunk at this point. "You're still gorgeous though, you just look kind of sad. Like your eyes do." He continued to blather on as he leaned against the kitchen counter. He was breathing his drunken breath directly on her cheek because it was so crowded. Their apartment was packed wall to wall with people, a good amount of them being perfect strangers. There had been a few people freebasing coke in the bathroom. But it was all pretty typical here. "What's wrong? Don't you like living here?" he subtly interrogated her. "Of course I do." She sort of giggled at his badgering. "Yes! I made her laugh!" he cheered excitedly. Kagome laughed. "You are such a moron." She teased him playfully. "I'm a moron, and you are a vision of beauty." He proclaimed with conviction as he pounded his chest. "Sesshomaru is a lucky son of a bitch. He gets to wake up next to you every morning. Fuck, I'm drunk." He continued to spout whatever silly thought entered his mind. Kagome smiled, she found it sweet that he thought so highly of her. "No wonder, you practically killed that whole bottle of whisky." She laughed taking the nearly empty bottle out of his grip. "Yeah, but I'll be sober in the morning and you will still be beautiful." He assured her with a wispy gaze. She swigged some of the bottle too. "I love this song." She tried to ignore his obvious come on. He was drunk and being stupid. But for some reason she played with the idea in her head. It's not as if Sesshomaru was her actual boyfriend or anything. They just slept together every night. She even sort of had a crush on Tyler. He was cute, with all of his tattoos and piercings and troublemaking. "I got you a present." Sesshomaru exclaimed as he pushed through the crowd in the kitchen. He pulled Kagome into a tight embrace. He pulled out the drugs he scored moments before. He already looked pretty fucked up though, so she figured out why it had taken him so long. "You got high without me." She scolded him slightly as he leaned in to be close to her. "I'm sorry babe. You know I have needs." He explained feebly as he touched her face. She rolled her eyes at his excuse. He was always doing selfish self-satisfying shit like that. It got frustrating sometimes, like when he left her at some dealers house as collateral for like two hours. "Yeah, well so do I." she muttered snatching the drugs from his hands. "Hey! Babes? What the fuck?" he voiced sternly as he followed her to their bedroom. She just sat down on the floor and tried to prepare the drugs herself. "Baby, I'm sorry. I lost track of the time. You know how it is. You shoot up, and you just zone." He attempted sooth her as he massaged her tense shoulders, and planted kisses on her neck. "I don't care, just leave me alone." She muttered shrugging away from his affection. He had been gone for hours, and this was becoming too commonplace for him. "I'm going to get some cigarettes" he'd say, or "I have some business to take care of" he'd lie and then show up hours later high as a kite trying to play it off as if he wasn't. "I'm tired of you lying to me all the time. You're fucking selfish, you don't care about me. Like what am I even doing here?" she sort of laughed at her own misguided decision to follow him here. It had been a desperate spur of the moment thing. She only said that because she knew it would get a reaction out of him. "Why would you even fucking say that?" he questioned gravely as he tried to hold her gaze. He leaned back against the bed, and rubbed his temples. "You don't even know how much I fucking love you. Like what do I have to do to prove it to you? I would do anything to prove it to you." He sounded desperate, as his voice became a whisper. "You don't need to prove anything to me." She mumbled before injecting herself with the sweet poison that helped her leave this world.


	10. Chapter 10

They were taking a new direction apparently. The label thought they needed some actual management and rebranding if they were ever going to be considered real musicians. So that obviously meant taking orders. Inuyasha sort of shrugged it off when he got his final paycheck as the bands unofficial manager. He was still part of the crew; he just wasn't getting paid to show up to rehearsals or gigs anymore. "The tour is gonna be sick. We're doing South by South West dude. I can't fucking believe this shit." Koga mused as the usual group of trouble makers sat around a booth in their favorite dive bar. They were celebrating the big news. "That's fucking sweet. You guys are like legit musicians then." Miroku cheered putting his arm around Sango and jostling her playfully in all the excitement. "Hell yeah, and we got passes for you guys too. They're like all access and shit." Ginta chimed in before guzzling down another beer. "Fuck what Tempura Records thinks. You will always be our manager Inuyasha." The guys all said in unison to reassure their good friend of his status as a member of the band. He smiled, feigning bashfulness. "Oh, you guys." He gushed jokingly. It was nice to know that they cared though. But he was actually relived to be completely relinquished of formal responsibility for Corporal Punishment. Now he had nothing but free time and opportunity to do his own thing. Whatever that was. "Austin Texas isn't ready for all this." Koga joked arrogantly as he finished off the last of their celebratory round of beers. "I'll go get us some more beer." Inuyasha offered gallantly, eliciting rousing cheers from his friends. It wasn't usually this impossible to get service in this place, but it was sort of crowded tonight. Maybe it was because people realized how cheap drinks were here. "Can I get another round please?" Inuyasha sort of groaned as he held out his money to the evasive bartender. No such luck. This new guy was sort of an asshole. "I've been trying that for the past 15 minutes." This voice sort of laughed at him. He turned around to be met with a sweet smirk. He smiled back at the pretty stranger, sort of at a loss for words. "It's usually not this busy. This is sort of insane." He mumbled stupidly scratching the back of his head. She nodded acceptingly. "I know. It's ridiculous, there's this stupid blog that's been promoting the shit out of this place. I kind of wanted to keep it under wraps. "She joked, tucking her silky brown hair behind her ears. He smiled. "That explains it. Blogs ruin everything." He rolled his eyes satirically. They stood there, taking in one another for a moment. Him with his grungy punk look that never really became affected by any L.A. trend bullshit. Her with her earthy ethereal natural glow that seemed to radiate from her very being. "I'm Rin." She piped up after it had been quiet for too long. She put out her hand for him to shake. He took it happily "Inuyasha." He replied serenely. She gave off this aura that just seemed so refreshing. "Can I buy you a drink, or something?" he asked timidly, not wanting to come off as to aggressive. She was clearly too sweet for that sort of approach. She beamed. "Only if you let me buy you one." She countered humorously. And thus beginning one of the best nights of his life in while. "I can't believe you lived in India. That is cool as hell." He lauded as they sat together at the bar just talking and drinking beers. She nodded. "It was awesome. I learned how to play the sitar, and met a lot of really cool inspirational people." She reminisced fondly in her own mind. "What are you doing in L.A. it's like the total opposite. People here are so artificial here." He sort of spat it out. She shrugged. "I grew up here, and I sort of just missed my friends and family. But I'm actually thinking about setting off on another adventure pretty soon. I'm just not sure where." She sighed exasperatedly. "What about you?" she challenged playfully. "I don't really know what I'm doing right now." He admitted honestly.

She was doing a nice thing for Sesshomaru, it being his birthday and everything. It didn't take away from the fact that they still weren't on such great terms at the moment. They'd been fighting a lot lately for the smallest of things. It could've been the fact that she forgot to kiss him goodnight, or he kept blowing money on his stupid schemes. They fought over everything, and Sesshomaru only made it worse by trying to quell her with his loving pleads. But she figured she'd cook him dinner or something, because she felt guilty. "You're a really sexy chef." She was greeted with a loving embrace as she attempted to make pasta. She never really cooked a day in her life. "Stop it Tyler. What if he comes home and sees us." She protested weakly, giggling as he kissed her neck. Tyler shrugged. "Let him see us." He whispered, not taking no for an answer. And she allowed herself to become distracted by him once again. She didn't really know how she let this happen. How she let herself get wrapped up in yet another personal attachment to someone. It was like she sought these destructive unions out. That was probably true though. "When are you gonna dump him? I'm sick of sharing you." Tyler grumbled playfully as they lay in bed, just enjoying each other's warmth. Kagome was quiet, she was slightly apprehensive about ending things simply because she knew how Sesshomaru was. She knew he wouldn't just accept her decision to leave him, and for his roommate no less. "Seriously Kagome. I want to be able to fall asleep with you in my arms and not having to worry about your fucking boyfriend walking in on us." He sounded slightly more concerned. "Can we talk about this later? Please." She silenced him sort of irritably. But she couldn't blame him for being so upset. It wasn't really fair to him. "We will talk. I promise." She assured him, planting a sweet kiss on his lips. He smirked. "Okay, but I think you're burning dinner." He sort of chuckled, reminding her of the pasta she left on the stove. "Fuck." She groaned before jumping up to recover what she could of the ruined meal. But to no avail. "Shit." Was all she could think to say in the wake of her neglect. And there was nothing she could do to remedy it because none other than Sesshomaru himself walked in before she even got the chance to clean up the mess. "Happy birthday babe." She tried to sound upbeat as she approached him. He just stood there, dejectedly. "What happened to you?" she asked gravely, finally noticing his black eye and stitched up brow. "I owed my dealer some money that I don't have. And his goons fucking jumped me outside of the fucking bar." He grumbled as he walked back towards their bedroom. "I called you from the hospital like a billion times. What the fuck were you doing?" he asked harshly as he sat down on the edge of the bed and took of his shoes. He threw one of them against the wall and cursed in anger. "I'm sorry, I was making you dinner. But I kind of fucked that up." She sincerely apologized, feeling suddenly overwhelmed with guilt. He stared up at her, for a long while. It was a scrutinizing look, and she just stood there awkwardly not really sure how to carry on. "Your hair is sticking up in the back." He sort of speculated. Kagome smoothed down her hair self-consciously. "Come here." He commanded her, and she complied coming close to him until his face was pressed into her stomach. He lifted her shirt up and ran his fingers across her bare stomach. "You think you can handle getting railed, back to back like this?" he questioned coldly as his piercing eyes stared up at her. She resisted his prodding slightly. "What are you talking about?" she spoke softly trying to avoid his eyes. "You must think I'm a fucking idiot Kagome. I know you've been fucking Tyler. And you've been fucking him on this bed! Our fucking bed!" he shouted in her face, making her tear up. "How could you do that to me? How could you fuck with me like that?" he continued to scream as he grabbed onto her arms and shook her violently. "You're hurting me." She whined defenselessly as his grip around her upper arms tightened. She's never seen him look so furious. It sort of scared her. "Chill the fuck out man." Tyler stepped in hearing the commotion from the other room. Sesshomaru chuckled darkly, releasing the hold he had on Kagome. She was visibly shaken. "You have a lot of fucking nerve. You fucking prick." He accused sharply, sauntering towards him. Kagome stepped in between them. "Stop it!" she shouted as the two of them continued to curse and lunge at each other. Sesshomaru took a swing and decked Tyler in the face. He staggered backwards into the hallway, cursing as he cupped his bloody nose. "I will fuck your shit up." Sesshomaru continued to holler; Kagome just shoved him further into the bedroom and closed the door behind her. "What the fuck did you expect? You caused this shit Kagome." He hollered as she remained pressed against the door, with Tyler pounding on the other side of it. She knew very well what she had done. She made a conscious decision to fuck up the living arrangement she had been given. "How could you do it? Why did you do it?" he was pretty much in hysterics pacing back and forth. "I'm sorry." She whispered hoarsely as she watched him punch a hole in the wall. She just cried because that was all she could think to do. "Fuck you, and your pathetic apologies. I'm fucking hurt Kagome." His voice broke with every syllable, as he fought back near tears. He sobbed, holding onto her tightly. He buried his face in her hair and cried. It was heartbreaking for her to see him like this. All broken and sad. She held on to him too, and let him kiss her full on the lips. "We can fix this okay. Please don't leave me." He begged, holding onto either side of her face. "We can get past this." He tried to convince her of this as well as himself. Kagome shook her head sadly as tears streamed down her face. "I'll find someplace else to live. I'm sorry." She apologized sincerely as she pulled away from him and left him alone in the shabby bedroom. Somehow he knew this whole scenario was bound to happen. But he was foolish enough to think that he could change her. That he could make her settle down with him. She never told him she loved him back. Not even once since they'd become so involved with one another. Some fucking birthday this turned out to be.


	11. Chapter 11

She really could have loved him. So much of him was reminiscent of Inuyasha. It was the way he did things, and said things. The way that he was. He wasn't troubled like her. That was the problem she had with Sesshomaru, he was damaged too. More damaged than anyone would ever know, so how could two broken people ever possibly work out together. They were just dragging one another down, crippling each other and enabling each other. Tyler wasn't a junkie, so he could take care of her the way she needed to be taken care of. And everything worked out perfectly for those first few months. They lived in a shitty shoebox apartment, and he worked 40+ hours a week at the waste management facility to pay the bills. He made enough money so that Kagome didn't have to work, and so that he could bankroll her growing dope habit. She would do opiates, and just sleep all day while he busted his ass at work. Tyler eventually grew tired of supporting her junk habit. "Hey, how was work?" Kagome asked him as she managed to make it out to the kitchen to fix herself something to eat after sleeping for a good portion of her day. Her eyes were barely open. "Are you ever not high off that shit Kagome?" he asked harshly, as he examined her sluggish behavior. The drugs were beginning to take their toll. She was ghostly pale, as if she had'nt seen daylight for centuries and she was losing a bunch of weight. "I haven't been using all week." she lied emptily. It had been more like a couple of days. Sesshomaru popped by the other day, and they got high together and fucked in the living room. She was just doing him a courtesy since he shared his drugs with her. "I'll believe that when I see it." he grumbled as he witnessed her drop her cup full of juice onto the floor. This is how it was everyday. "It's like you don't even give a fuck that we lost the baby. i'm starting to think you did it on purpose. You're such a fucked up person it really wouldn't surprise me." He threw that verbal barb at her so unexpectedly. Kagome breathed in deeply. He was ruining her high. "It wasn't even yours, so why do you care so much? My womb is just too polluted, get over it." she said so nonchalantly, it was insulting. "Fuck you. Fuck you so much," Tyler hollered at her before leaving the room in frustration. She knew how to really get under peoples skin. She really could have loved him, if she didn't already have such a void in her heart.

It didn't take them long to reunite again. Sesshomaru had come into a small fortune from gambling and dealing simultaneously, and she was in need of a new adventure. She could always count on him for adventure. The were better off as partners in crime, rather than in a relationship and they both came to realize this. "I've always wanted to go to every music festival since I went to Bonnaroo when I first moved out here." Sesshomaru mused quietly, as he played in Kagomes hair. He still couldn't help but love her. She was like him in female form, and he absolutely loved himself. She was down for anything. "There's so many drugs, the drugs are amazing. I swear to god the best dope I ever had was at Bonnaroo. This guy with dreads just gave it to me in exchange for a cigarette." he laughed dubiously. Kagome smirked. "Sounds like fun." she mused quietly as she looked up at him from her resting spot in his lap. "I'm really tired of this place." she whispered closing her eyes for a long while. She had nodded off, and then woke up in a coasting vehicle. "Whose car is this?" she asked Sesshomaru as she adjusted in her seat and lit a cigarette. He shrugged with a huge smirk on his face. He just sped down the highway in an indiscernible direction. Kagome just sat back, not bothering with a whole bunch of questions. She was glad to be leaving Nashville behind, the truth behind. "When were you gonna tell me you were pregnant?" Sesshomaru asked her casually, completely catching her off guard. "It's really none of your business." she muttered coldly. He laughed lightly. "Its totally my fucking child, so it is my business." he accused her sharply. "How did you even know?" she asked, truly curious. Sesshomaru smirked again. "You haven't been using as much, you make me turn the lights off when we're fucking, your boobs are getting bigger." he started listing off things. She just stared out the window. "You're gonna keep it?" he asked sort of hopefully, as they drove down the highway. She already felt bad enough for lying to Tyler about losing the baby. It was only because she didn't want to stop using dope, or she couldn't stop. He looked so devastated when she broke the 'news' to him. "I don't know." she whispered feeling her eyes well up with tears. If she wanted to keep this thing and carry it to term she definitely had to quit using full stop. "If you keep it, want us to be together. Get married and all that. I'll take care of us Kagome. We could be a real family." he pitched his idea to her like it was the solution to all of her problems. "We would be good together. We'd do everything for that kid that our parents never did. We wouldn't fuck this kid up, I swear to you." he pleaded with her. Kagome sighed. It could never just be simple with him. "Imagine how much love you would feel for this thing. This thing we created. Unconditional love." He said with a smile in his voice. Kagome looked over at him, considering the idea. It could be exactly the solution that she needed. "Where would we live?" she asked him, as she watched his smiled grow wider. He looked at her with so much tenderness in his eyes. "Somewhere nice." he promised her as they stared into each others eyes. It seemed like life had suddenly gained some meaning, and purpose for the both of them.

It was hot as balls in Austin Texas. It was just hot as balls in Texas in general, but the close quarters of this music festival made everything that much more miserable. They got stuck with all of the grunt work, selling the merchandise, and setting up all the equipment on stage, while Koga and the guys schmoozed with the other artists and musicians. Inuyasha was struggling to assemble the drum kit by himself as this pair of feminine hands cupped themselves over his eyes. He smirked knowingly, as silver and gold bangles dangled against his face. "Glad you could make it." he said planting a firm kiss on Rins lips. She had come all this way, well she came to the festival with her friends every year, but she was going to hangout with him and the guys the entire weekend. Their relationship was progressing at a surprisingly alarming rate. Inuyasha never had girlfriends, he had always been to stuck on Kagome to even bother with it. But he was truly happy. Rin really made him happy. She was so carefree, but not in the same way as Kagome who was just plain reckless. She was a happy person and it exuded from her and made him happy too. And everyone loved her. It was really hard not to. Just looking at her made you want to smile. "When do the guys perform? I can't wait to start a mosh pit." she joked trying her best to sound hardcore. Inuyasha laughed, and kissed her on the nose. "They go on later tonight. Should be good, but I'm afraid that Koga's gonna get too drunk or high or something." he admitted openly. "He has to reach the right level of fucked up to perform adequately though. If not, he's too self conscious on stage." he analyzed his friends performances to reach this ultimate conclusion. Rin nodded in understanding. "Why the fuck is my mom calling me?" Inuyasha asked quizzically, as his phone vibrated violently. He hadn't heard from her in months, so assumed the worst. He assumed his brother had finally overdosed or something. "Mom? Wait...what? Whose wedding? Who's getting married?" he tried to get her to calm down but she was frantically throwing all this information at him. "Sesshomaru, and Kagome are getting married." she delivered the news to him carefully. Though she was happy for her son, she understood the implications of this. She wasn't completely ignorant to the fact that both of her sons had been so deeply involved with the same girl for several years. She just assumed Inuyasha had moved at this point. Inuyasha was in shock. It was almost as if she had told him that someone had died. He felt his heart breaking all over again. "They're having an intimate wedding on your grandparents farm in Oregon, You remember the one we used to go to every summer. They're moving back home for a little bit, I want to help Kagome with the baby and everything." she continued to dump this heavy load all over him. He felt his heart shrinking. "Baby?" he whispered helplessly. "Yes sweetheart, isn't that wonderful for your brother? He's going to get to experience fatherhood pretty soon. She's more than five months along in her pregnancy. I'll send you pictures. They are both doing so well. Your brother has been clean and sober for a very long time now."she pleaded Sesshomarus case. Inuyasha was just numb. It was like he wasn't hearing anything his mother was saying. He hung up on her, and marched over to where Sango and Naraku were goofing off and selling the bands merch. "They're getting fucking married, and he knocked her up. Can you believe this shit?" Inuyasha was on the verge of tears. His friends exchanged knowing looks with one another. "You knew about this huh?" he accused sharply, before walking away from his supposed friends. "Here us out Yash. No one had the heart to tell you." Sango defended their betrayal as she and Miroku chased him down. "They actually seem happy. We all skyped with them the other day and they invited us to the wedding. All of us." Miroku said carefully, as his friend just stared hatefully at him. "Fuck you." Inuyasha spat at them as he walked off to go smoke a cigarette. His day was officially ruined.


End file.
